Sunday, August 15, 2010

How lame am I?

OK, does this make me lame or just a mom?

Kaitlyn is going to camp this summer and I can't tell you how many time's I've just watched in sweet awe as I dropped her off at camp feeling how lucky I am to live within walking distance to this wonderful camp and community and how lucky I felt to be a mom.

On Friday they had an all camp Talent Show. Each of the age groups did a little number. I was able to go and watch (yeah, a break from work) and as soon as I sat down in the back of the room, I started tearing up. Then I really broke down and the poor mom next to me asked if I was ok.

The emotions sometimes of everything are right there under the surface. I'm always so surprised by it. This time I just felt joyous for being a mom and for being able to experience this. I was brought back to wanting a child so badly after years of trying and not having any luck (for what ever reason). Then of course the emotion was for how elated I was that Kaitlyn was here, experiencing this camp and how much love I felt for her.

And then lastly, it was sadness, for feeling the loss that her sister should be here experiencing it at the same time.

I literally almost cried through the whole "bumble bee" song (Kaitlyn is in the Bumble bee camp for 4 year olds) and as they acted out being lions from the Lion King. It was soo cute!

Anyway, maybe I am lame, but I think I'm just a mom and so eternally grateful to be a mom that has been able to experience so much through the miracle of my little wonderful amazing daughter (and son!).


Kristin @ The Krumwiede 6 said...

you most certainly are NOT lame... you are AMAZING!!! :)

JD said...

You are definitely not lame. I teared up at my son's Kindergarten performance and I have not been thru anything in comparison to you. It's just part of being a Mom...the roller coaster ride that it is. The hardest thing yet most rewarding thing that we'll ever do.

ypersico said...

I moved forward with every hurdle of our medically remarkable son - and at his sixth grade graduation I was helplessly sobbing as though someone had died - and I sobbed for six weeks. I am not sure all of what was I released ~ I know I have been always connected to profound gratitude and the iracle of having our son with us every day - something was touched - opened- and released at the graduation. Something I didn't even know was there. It takes what it takes ~ it is all grace and all a miracle. You are not lame at all. You are amazing <3