Friday, June 26, 2009

Horrible News!!

My client's Floating Home burnt down last night!!!

After I heard the news I called Jim (my client) and he said he was going to call me to tell me "that he wanted to drop the listing price." But I had already heard the news.

My heart goes out to him. His home was crafted entirely by him, it was some of the most beautiful wood work you could imagine.

From the Marin IJ:
"Firefighters with the help of two fire boats were able to contain an explosive two-alarm blaze Thursday afternoon that gutted one houseboat and nearly destroyed another on the Sausalito waterfront.

Fire crews who arrived near the end of Liberty Dock at Waldo Point Harbor at about noon found a big column of smoke rising from a two-story houseboat at 49 Liberty Dock that was fully engulfed in flames. Fire then shot over to the neighboring houseboat at 48 Liberty Dock....

News story Link w/pictures of fire

Watch video of fire

There are more pictures of his home on my listing website:

There is going to be a benefit for Jim, my client. As soon as I know more, I'll post it here!

Monday, June 22, 2009

Response to Comments from Happy and Sad Post

Felt this should have it's own post.

This is in reply to a commenter from my previous post:


Sorry but I had to reply. My gosh!!!

I could just delete, but if you've been reading my blog for any length of time, I don't delete others opinions, but I had to reply....

Jean's Quote: " as a regular reader, I have to finally say that I wish you'd please, please, stop classifying your children as "super-duper delayed" and focusing on the loss of Corrine. Kids develop at varying rates - some are faster than others and some are slower than others. And not every child who doesn't sit up when you want him to needs some sort of intervention. "

My response: Quinn is STIFF, very STIFF. So Stiff that I can't get him into his car seat, bend his legs to put his leg into his pj's and I can't put him in sitting position at times. He also wants to arch backwardes out of my arms. This isn't my "wanting" him to sit! His is now totally able to sit on his own (and prefers to at all times) he can't get to sitting position, He can't roll, nor do much else.

Our Pediatrician did notice at his 9 month review that he's delayed (3 months delayed, reminder he is only 6 weeks early). She offered the ability to visit a PT one time. I declined, feeling (hoping) that things would get better. They haven't, they have gotten worse and I know that our Pediatrican will agree when we see her for our 12 month check up next month.

Quinn hyperextends his legs and arms and it's preventing him from developing as he should. At this point PT and EI CAN help him to get back on track. I KNOW this. It's not when I "want" him to sit up. How can you "offer" opinions when you don't really know what he's doing? I haven't posted much about it, as I've been hoping that he would stop doing the stiff legs and arms and hoping it was from reflux. But it's getting worse not better.

You think I don't know that kids develop at different times? If he was just developing slower than I'd agree. But Quinn is doing things that are very noticeable.

Jean's Quote:

"Many kids aren't good drinkers of breast milk or formula. Life with an infant can be difficult - most infants are not fun most or all of the time, they are a TON of work! "

my response - do all infants have blood in their stool and scream bloody murder? No. Because of my persistence we discovered that Quinn had a milk protein intolerance (from my drinking dairy). After we got him on an elemental formula and reflux meds he went from hardly drinking 3 ounces at a time and screaming all the time, to drinking 8 ounces.

Ok, and what's normal? Probably not your neighbor coming over to ask if everything is ok when they've heard Quinn screaming for hours on end.

Jean's quote: "But constantly complaining, worrying and researching which dreaded disorders your children might have takes away the precious time you have with them - time that is particularly precious if you're a mom with lots of outside activities and a demanding career."

my response - constantly researching dreaded disorders???? WHAT?? Not sure where you fabricated this from...Don't even know what to stay about one... Is this in regards to Quinn? Fabricating bloody stool? Signs of reflux?

Or Kaitlyn? I believe that is my research to find solutions is why Kaitlyn is doing so well today. She is going to graduate out of special education at her 4th birthday. I'm soooo happy. She still has issues, but she is doing GREAT. Really Great!

Jean's quote:
" I know Kaitlyn has difficulties that need to be addressed, but for goodness sake - let Quinn grow for awhile without trying to classify him as a candidate for (in your words, not mine) "the short bus.""

My response - Quinn WAS a preemie. He IS delayed. He is hyperextending his legs, arms and trunk, he wants to stand on tip toes when put on his feet. He goes stiff at any opportunity. This can be from reflux from pain. I don't know. He had a GI follow-up today and The GI couldn't believe how stiff he gets. She said that he indeed should be evaluated.

I'm SAD and BUMMED that this is happening. I'm not making this up. I wanted a regular experience this time around, and Quinn isn't easy. I've EVER expected babies to be easy. (I'm sure you've got something to say about my comment here).

I KNOW that he'll be fine. But I also know that EI will help him. and I NEVER said that he needs special education (or my one time of saying the short bus...which you took totally out of context."

Jean's quote: "Finally, I truly believe you should see a counselor for your paralyzing grief. I know you will always grieve Corrine's loss - it was and is a terrible thing. Despite that fact, you need to move forward. You need to let Kaitlyn be Kaitlyn and not attribute her perfectly normal habit of talking to herself (i.e. entertaining herself) to missing her sister. Kids talk to themselves - frequently while lying in bed waiting to fall asleep. While sad, it is true that Corrine and Kaitlyn shared a womb and that Corrine died so Kaitlyn will never know her. But the reality is that Kaitlyn didn't know her and can only be hampered by you not letting go of them as a two-some. Any grief she feels now and in the future over that loss will be because of your desire to instill grief in her psyche, not a cosmic attachment from the womb."

my comment:

"shesh! paralyzing grief! Did you not read that I stood outside my daughter's door for almost 10 minutes smiling from ear to ear at how amazing my daughter is?

The grief that came on was from a realization that I wish my TWO daughters were talking to one another. Is this paralyzing? hell no! I miss my daughter. I miss her not being here. I don't know if you have lost a child or not. BUT I know that I will hold the empty space in my heart for my ENTIRE life.

I don't recall writing as Jean said: the reason she was talking was due "to missing her sister" . I felt it was so great that she is having imagination play (she's only been doing this for a few months now) and I loved it. Yes, after quite a long time, I got hit by a wave of sadness (which I honestly said here) and I got sad that she wasn't in the room "playing" with her sister, should her sister be alive today.

And yes, maybe you find it creepy, but I do believe that Kaitlyn's sister Corinne watches over her. And I'm sorry if you feel that I have paralyzing guilt" that I thought of Kaitlyn "talking" to her angel sister.

I recently met a grandmother in her 80's that told me she lost a child. She carries that "grief" still, but she's living her life. It's not paralyzing me. It's healthy the way I look at it, I think it's more worrisome for those that ignore it. That grief IS there somewhere inside. How can it not be? It's what you do with that grief and whether you let it run your life (I certainly do not).

For those that know me, they would NEVER call me paralyzed with Grief. I'm a very happy person. I love helping others with their situation (just today a mom called me with a difficult decision to make about carrying twins or not).

Jean's quote: "I have always found it a bit disturbing that you take Kaitlyn to twins events. It sometimes seems like a pathetic plea for attention - "look at me, I'm the mom with one surviving twin, feel bad for me because my daughter died at birth." I think it is creepy that you would force your young child to be a singleton at twin events and absorb the idea that she will never be a whole person in your eyes - she will always be the live one-half of a pair for which you endlessly grieve.

My response. Now in this case I think you have a point. I realize that. When I first attended a twin moms event not long after Kaitlyn came home from the NICU, the Club President told me, "Liz, we'd still welcome your membership, you are a mom of twins and will always be a mom to twins." That's stuck with me.

There are a few reasons I still belong to my local twins club and I'll tell you: 1) The moms that I met when my water first broke hold a special place in my heart. They were there to support my in my darkest times and I will forever cherish their friendship and support (to me a stranger at the time) . I attend functions to see them and they always want to know how Kaitlyn is doing. They really care. Now I mainly attend the mom's functions. These are my friends!

2). I had a hard time bonding with moms in regular moms groups. Their experience of motherhood was nothing like what I was going through with Kaitlyn. It's harder to be a mom of twins than it is of a singleton. They "got" a bit more of how hard my life was so I didn't have to hear women complain about how their child "spit up" or applying for preschools (when I just wanted my daughter to eat)" That may sound heartless, but it's the truth.

3) I haven't taken Kaitlyn to any twin events now for close to a year as now she is getting older and I don't want it to be uncomfortable for her. (this is where I think Jean made a good point), I don't want to be there for a pity party for me, especially for the moms who have never met me before. It was nice to go when I knew so many members and know their children, I have more friends in the local twins group than I do in other mom's club. It felt like "home" to me.

4) I continue to belong to the club as I get asked all the time to help mothers who have lost twins or are having serious twin pregnancy complications.

jean said: "I started to read your blog because it provided some information I needed when dealing with a similar situation. But now, I look because it is like a car wreck - I can't seem to turn away."

My response: Train wreck? hmm, don't know how to comment on that one!

Jean's quote: " Please, please, get some help for yourself before you damage your children. And yes, fellow blog readers, I know I am a terrible person for saying these truthful things, but I am concerned for those two beautiful and perfect children - Kaitlyn and Quin. Sometimes, the truth hurts, but that pain might trigger a change for the better. Probably not, though. And to make everyone happy, I will now avert my gaze."

My response: "damage my children" How in the world am I damaging my children? The truth hurts?

I'm all for the truth. I will tell Kaitlyn about her sister. I am very aware that she could suffer from survivors guilt. I will do EVERYTHING in my power to prevent that from happening. I know that Quinn wouldn't be here with me today if I hadn't lost Corinne. We only wanted to have 2 children. I'm forever blessed to have my son Quinn.

Those who really KNOW me know that I have found the positive in Corinne's passing. I tell folks this when they ask me how I can seem so "unaffected" when I tell them about Corinne's passing.

I truly believe in finding the positive in really crappy situations. I'd take Corinne back in a heart beat, and spare Kaitlyn from her prematurity related issues, BUT I have found: amazing new friends, strength that I never knew I had, the ability to help others more than I ever had in the past, getting involved with charities, and the ability to overcome such hardships to come out a better person.

So, please tell me what type of damage I'm inflicting?

Oh and one other thing, I often write how I am feeling at a moment in time. I'm crazy busy. (you can probably tell by my infrequent blog posts). Life is good. Really good. I don't take the time to post as I'm spending time with my kids (and working), which is MORE important than blogging right?

And to the poster after Jean, how dare you say that "Kaitlyn find her voice" do know that Kaitlyn has a paralyzed vocal chord don't you? What type of voice do you "want" her to find? You said rebel against me? Do you know how often I hold her tight (when she lets me, which is ONLY in the shower due to her dislike of being held) and tell her over and over how special she is to me, how much I love her and how happy I am that I'm her mama?


Saturday, June 20, 2009

Happy and Sad

Kaitlyn LOVES to talk to herself. She does it all the time.

She often (when not finding excuses to leave her bedroom) talks to herself in her room for almost 2 hours before she falls asleep.

Tonight, she was talking so much I stood outside her door and listened, which brought such a huge feeling of joy to me. She is soooo darn cute! She was talking about wearing party hats that had a roller coaster on it, and says things like: "oh, yes, I'd love to wear a party hat." "Oh, I lost the party hat, where is it?" "oooh, I think it's in the bushes." "Yes, there is a roller coaster on my party hat!" "Yes, I'd love a cupcake, oh, it's an imaginary cup-cake, mmmmm it's good, Yes, I'd like a cupcake.".....

So darn cute. I felt so incredibly happy listening to my little miracle

Then all of a sudden, I got hit with an incredible sadness. I started tearing up there outside her door. It hit me as I listened to her for over 5 minutes talking with herself (or her imaginary friend) that she might be talking to her sister. She SHOULD be talking to her sister. Maybe that's why she talks to herself so much, she's actually talking to her angel sister who I KNOW is always looking over Kaitlyn's shoulder.

Oh, I miss Corinne. She should be here with us.

Happy Father's Day!

Brian and Kaitlyn are going camping for the next 3 days. I can't go, I'm swamped with work (a good thing obviously), but I'm sad as I really wanted to go on Kaitlyn's first camping trip, and I've been working 7 days a week for along time now and could use a break!.

But we ARE going on vacation soon to the East Coast (Chautauqua, NY, I can't wait! (and Hope I can get everything done until we leave!)

More about Quinn in a later post, the little guy LOVES to eat real food (talk about the tears this brings me, as he's never been a good milk/formula drinker), but he is super duper delayed. I'm finally quite worried about him. I've got to contact the Regional Center about getting an evaluation. sigh. it's never easy is it?

Kaitlyn today at a birthday party for her friend Eliza from her Special Ed class. The most amazing balloon guy was there, and of course, Katilyn tried to take everyone's balloons.

Tuesday, June 09, 2009

PTS disorder linked to preemie parents

Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) Good article, relates to my earlier post about a micro mom allegedly doing a horrible thing to her child.


Some Pictures...

Blogging started out as a way to past the time (as I was lying in bed praying for my twins), now my life is so crazy busy, that I get stressed out thinking that I MUST blog. Sorry for the blog lagging lately, but work has to take a precedence!, which is a good (no great thing) that I'm busy again in Real Estate. I do love to blog and continue to want to do it in more earnest, but at this piont, I've got to pay the bills!)

Kaitlyn's last day of Special Ed preschool is tomorrow! I'm sad, I really love her teachers....But she will be back in preschool (the 3 year old class again next year repeated) and she will be in a week of summer special ed too.

Quinn's first little bottom teeth are just finally showing themselves, he is a very opinionated little guy! About everything! Last night I had 1.5 hours of crying (not going to bed). poor little guy (poor mom!)

So, at least here are some pictures!

My daughter likes sweets a lot like her mom, hard to believe how MUCH she likes to eat (well sweets at least!) How do you like her glasses by the way! They are from ZenniOptical

This was taken on Saturday, Kaitlyn is sitting next to another micro preemie twin (whose water broke at 17 weeks like on Corinne). Look at the 2 of them chomping down their birthday cake!

OK a mystery man holding Quinn, any guesses? his name is Brian (but it's not Quinn's dad......) He likes ice skating like Quinn's dad....(figure not hockey however...) Any Guesses??. PS, what do you think about my new VERY SHORT hair cut?

It's Brian Boitano, Olympic Gold Medalist of course! Brian is the god-father to my good friend Lisa's children (she has 2 sets of twins). I met Lisa through our children (our non-eating children) and we've become good friends. We attended her 4 children's birthday party on Saturday and got to visit again with Brian Boitano (who loved the color of Quinn's hair by the way!) Brian and Lisa grew up ice skating together.

Kaitlyn visiting her dad at work
And wearing dad's fire helmet

Wednesday, June 03, 2009

Just a quick note

It's almost midnight. Have GOT to get to bed. Just wanted to give a quick update on everyone:

me: I was in Sacramento for the last few days for another Women's Council State Meeting, where I had to do some public speaking. I have 4 houses in escrow and wrote another offer tonight. I think the real estate market (at least here in Marin) is picking up!

Kaitlyn: is finally better after 2 weeks of being sick. She seemed to be back to her cheerful self today (after weeks of whining and crying). For the first time she actually ate some of her dinner neatly! (she has to be the messiest eater of all times). She lost close to 2 pounds over the last 2 weeks, but seemed to eat a lot tonight finally.

Quinn: Boy, he's one sensitive little guy. 2 nights last week I had 2.5 hours of crying in the middle of the night. It might be teething, as I can see a little of his bottom teeth finally coming in. He's still quite delayed. He is FINALLY sitting up on his own (but we have to get him to sitting). He will also now allow us to leave him on his belly for a while, but he can't seem to roll over any more in any direction. He is able to push himself around in a circle while on his belly, (I think he's trying to roll, but get's his arms stuck). He isn't eating great, but I have to say, when he does want to eat solids, it's soooo amazing to watch him open his mouth. That's something that is totally new to me! His milk/formula intake has gone way down (I'm hoping it's just cause he was sick the last 2 weeks). we'll see. But I do have to say, when he's not crying, he's the happiest, cutest giggly smiley little guy ever! Just wish he wasn't such an "extreme" little man. Boy can he cry and drive his mama a bit loco!

On a side note, I'm in total shock, as one of my micro preemie blog mom members has been in the news with a shockingly awful news story. I'm not going to mention the details here, as this is a criminal case, but for those of you who know what I'm talking about, I at least had to blog that I'm in shock, saddened and just speechless. I know this mom. She's been a member of my group for a long time and has been a very active participant.

I do believe that this is a mental illness situation. But it's heartbreakingly sad for her children and her husband.

When I feel I can, (as I'm sure this is going to be a very public story) I'll post the link. In the meantime, for those of you who know what I'm talking about, just know I'm in shock and am trying to decide what to do about it for the groups sake.

Hug and love your children! Please be good to them!