Monday, November 14, 2005

Kaitlyn Kangaroo

Yesterday and today I got to "Kangaroo Care" Kaitlyn. This means skin to skin contact. They again took her off the CPAP so I could hold her. It was the the most amazing feeling - I'm so full of emotions now as I look at these pictures again I can hardly type.

I have a daughter. She is a alive and breathing. I am a mother! I miss her sister terribly, but I finally feel like I have a reason to feel joyous. Joy and elation fill my heart, I've suffered so much these last months and now I know it was all worth it. Look at my beautiful, amazing daughter in my arms. I am only able to hold her one time a day, as it's still a lot of effort on Kaitlyn's part, (due to sensory overload of being out of the incubator), but the good news is that she continues to handle it very well and definitely seems to like to be in my arms. Feeling her little body as she breathes against my chest is such an amazing feeling.
Here are more pitures from these last 4 days of holding Kaitlyn. She is up to 14 cc's of milk and will go up to 15 cc's tomorow (which is 1/2 an ounce) at each feeding, every 2 hours. Kaitlyn is now 2 pounds 8 ounces! She was 1 pound, 10 ounces when she was born. She has almost gained one full pound.
You can click on any of the images below to view a larger version.

The first day I held Kaitlyn - look at her looking at mom!

Brian holding Kaitlyn for the first time. It's now easier to see how small she really is in his arms.

It was so amazing how Kaitlyn liked looking up at mom. Wow, did my heart just melt right there on the spot. This is my daughter!! And she's absolutely beautiful. (the oxygen tubing is cutting into her cheek a bit). Look at all her hair and it's really turning lighter too.

The 2nd day of holding Kaitlyn. This time it was not as "rewarding" as she was still on the CPAP. After I hold her they are still putting her back on the CPAP. Hard to see the little lady. You can see now why it's especially great to hold her, as I really am getting to "see" her for the very first time without all the wires, tubes, blankets, etc.

First Kangaroo hold, Yesterday. Kaitlyn is trying to look up at me, but the angle is a bit tough for both mom and Kaitlyn to see each other. Her warm body next to mine was absolutely amazing!

Liz looking at Kaitlyn

From yesterday's visit

This picture was taken today, before "kangaroo" holding Kaitlyn. There is a lot of prep time in order for me to hold her. In this picture she had just pulled out her own feeding tube - yes, she's still strong and fiesty - but she still has the tape on her chin that normally holds the feeding tube down. No IV's any more! the amount of items attached to Kaitlyn has gone dramatically. (and make sure you see the "poor" diapering job. This was mom's doing. The diapers are still so big on her, and Kaitlyn doesn't make it and easier with her kicking and wires getting tangled in her feet).

Kaitlyn slept calmly like this for an hour, yes a whole hour. I took her little pink hat off and her blanket for this picture. Her pink hat is the same size as her Halloween orange hat that you saw Brian model a few weeks ago. She is still so very small. And I spend a lot of the time looking up at the monitors every time they alarm, making sure she is alright. They sound when her oxygen saturation is too high as well as too low. She kept sating high, so the alarm kept sounding. This means that she tolerated it very well.


Anonymous said...

she is SOOOOO adorable!!!

we're all so happy for you, mom :)

Kristen Lenfest said...

She is gorgeous..such a blondie. Seriously she has more hair then Emma did when she was several months old! I am so happy that you finally get to hold her. Isn't it the most amazing feeling!!!

Love Kristen!

Laurie Abbey, fellow prom mom said...

What overwhelming joy you must feel to hold your little girl. It has been a long time in the works. Congratulations!

Anonymous said...

Oh Liz! She's absolutely beautiful!

:) Steph & Patrick

Anonymous said...

She is a beauty! Love the blond hair! She is getting bigger by the day! What a joy for all of you! Nancy

Anonymous said...

Liz & Brian-

She looks so content with her mom and dad! She already looks like a great mix of the two of you. I'm so happy that you got to hold her. We'll keep the prayers up!

Love, Diana

Anonymous said...

I am soooo happy that you are finally experiencing the joys of motherhood (and fatherhood)! It is truly magical! Who could have told you that the touch of your baby's skin to your own would be the most incredible experience of your life! Enjoy every second! (like I need to tell you that!)
All my love, Sue

Michelle Flannagan said...

I'm so glad you were able to Kangaroo, I think I cried the whole time the first few times.
See if the NICU has a hand mirror so you can see her face, or pick one up.
She is such a beauty!
Take care, Michelle